I try to cherish every moment, but even as they happen they're so fleeting I'm afraid I'll never store enough up to last... motherhood is the greatest blessing and the worst agony a woman could ever endure. It's strength, and weakness, and terror and joy. And I've got two girls to watch grow up. I am so proud of them... and yet I weep to see how fast they grow. Caroline was with her grandparents not quite two months and she grew so much in so short a span! I can't believe how much I missed in that little bit of time. She's seven years old but Goddess help me, she acts like she's 17 going on 70!!! What did I ever do to deserve such children?? Mike is the best father. You should see him with Bella... all tender and smiling like there's nothing else in the world but her. He rocks her to sleep when she's having a bad night and she conks out on his shoulder. He checks her every time she bumps her head, and reassures her that she's okay. I would never have imagined my life would be like this. I never thought I'd have kids, much less more than one... never mind the amazing husband! At best, I figured it would be a long rough road to find my soulmate but he popped out of nowhere and now... now I have the fullest heart and warmest home I can imagine. Sure, our house is old and falling apart in places, but it's ours, and my family is here.
I am reminded of Robert Burns' statement, in "The White Goddess"
"All acts of love and pleasure are My rituals."
Then every day is a ritual to Her, for my every act is one of love and pleasure.
Isabella will be 7mo tomorrow. Hard to believe it's been that long already. She's crawling, and standing, and chattering away. She tries to eat everything she can get her grubby little paws on (I know... babies do that!) I'm still nursing, though we're letting her taste solid food here and there. I'm going to try to nurse as long as possible, max the benefits. Caroline is prouder than ever, and even more excited now that her baby sister is of an age that they can actually play together a bit. We're trying to read lots of books to her but she prefers eating them to listening. Oh, and she loves the Dell Lollipop commercial, but we can't figure out if it's the song or the bright shiny colors she likes. And my dear cub also really enjoys the iTunes visualizer. It's actually rather amusing to see her sit here and watch the jellyfish animation dance around.